Friday, December 29, 2006

To Loyce, Al, and Sylvia .... a Reply to Your Comment

To Loyce (Jody), Al, and Sylvia ... a Reply to Your Comment

I found your comment to be quite interesting, especially considering your confused and telling statement. (Please, for future reference, please make your comments under the current dated entry....not at a past entry date. There are places where comments can be made at each blog entry right at the bottom of each dated entry. Please read the comments after each post/dated entry.)

I will quote your comment here:

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"Anonymous said...

You have single handedly destroyed one of the most spiritual and healing services Medicare ever supported. Maybe you have better read those bible verses again - judge not lest ye be judged."

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What you do not understand is that Medicare DOES NOT support the type of *involuntary* euthanasia by dehydration which each of you imposed on an awake and alert person. It WAS NOT her choice! She had no idea that her trip to that hospital was for her life to be electively ended at your request! Just as you told us that her hospitalization (actually hospice suite admission for terminal sedation) was for medication adjustment and to check for electrolyte imbalances....you knew it was to be her last visit anywhere. YOU chose it and scheduled it.

It was each of *YOU* that *JUDGED* the quality of Granny's life to be unworthy of living. Who gave *YOU* that authority? What criteria did you use to justify your decision to terminate her life? Was it that she was going to finally use some of HER OWN money for her extended care? Did *YOU* want to keep that money for yourselves? Did *YOU* want to be free to travel to Scottsdale on a whim without a second thought of anyone else? Did you want to be able to go out with friends without worry of her care in an extended care facility? Did you decide it was time for her life to end because *YOU WERE TIRED OF BEING BOTHERED*?

Who perceived themselves to be the *JUDGES* of what life is worth living?
Did you usurp God's authority and plan? Did you become weary of waiting for God to call Granny home, so *YOU* sent her to him? This WAS NOT HIS TIMING, NOR HIS CHOICE.

Not only did you decide and plan her death....an awake, ambulatory, talking, eating, laughing and conversing person....but you requested it and watched it happen in one of the the slowest and most tragic manners possible.
*YOU WATCHED* them DEHYDRATE her to death...for TWO WEEKS! And you have the audacity to call that a spiritual and healing act????? God Help Us All! Where is your heart? Where is your sanity?

Each of you *KNEW* this wasn't RIGHT! That is why you lied about the purpose of the hospital admission. That is why you continued to lie to us at each phone call! Only when I had asked enough pointed questions to begin to understand what may be happening and voiced that, did you suddenly become angry and *oh so defensive*. If you thought what you were choosing was right, you wouldn't have lied to us. You would have been honest ... but, you knew.

What research did you do? Did you seek cousel with your preacher or clergy? Did you research how death actually occurs by dehydration? Did you research this hideous practice at all? Yet, you chose it and scheduled it...and watched it carried out on your own mother and grandmother! Are your hearts totally made of stone?

This action of choosing *terminal sedation* has only been a choice for the past few years. It is a new and often money-seeking venture for *some* hospices. You chose it for *YOUR* benefit, obviously... all the while trying to convince yourselves that it was for her benefit. I think your delusion will not keep you comfortable forever.

Today would have been Granny's birthday. She would also have enjoyed another Christmas with family, another big dinner, and time with loved ones. One more birthday would have been welcomed by her. You chose for her NOT TO BE ALLOWED THAT TIME. She was given Ativan when at home, and not at her request! Ativan has terrible side effects in even young, healthy adults. Her increase in confusion is almost certainly a response to the Ativan that was recommended by the hospice workers to be given to her. Then, in the hospice suite, she was repeatedly and frequently given morphine (although there was NO NEED for morphine) under her tongue to make her too sleepy to be able to drink or ask for a drink of water...and every time she did wake, water was refused and more morphine given....until she slowly dehydrated and organ systems shut down... until she died.

I don't know how you sleep....or how you go about any of your days knowing that you chose to have your mother/grandmother/mother-in-law INVOLUTNARILY EUTHANIZED! If you do a bit of internet research, you will see what the term *involuntary euthanasia* is a synonym for ... go take a look.

Me, judging? Not actually. I have reviewed and weighed the facts. These are FACTUAL events. No judgment necessary. It clearly states in the Bible, *THOU SHALL NOT KILL*. And, what was it that you chose to have happen to Granny? You chose for her life to be ended...at your own request. That is the simple indesputible FACT. YOU judged her life *unworthy*. YOU judged her to lack *your definition* of quality. YOU judged her to be too time consuming. YOU judged her to not be worth the expense of long term care options and that all long term care facilities to be unacceptable. YOU judged her and YOU sentenced her to death. YOU watched it happen. YOU knew she was having all fluids withheld...you agreed. YOU kept water from being given to a thirsty woman. And *YOU* have the gall to call this a spiritual and healing experience??? How deceived are you? How sick is your heart? How corrupt is your mind? Healing...for what or who?

Now, enjoy your partying or trips to the second home in Scottsdale, and your frequent vacations. Have your fun while you can. An accounting will ultimately be held before God by each of us for what we have done. And, this will not go unnoticed. You will have to answer for YOUR choice and YOUR judgments.

God forgive us all. When our society, and even our own relatives, see right as wrong...and wrong as right....what have we become?

This is being addressed in the present time by many more people than my sister and I. Those responsible will be addressed. You will see. Take a moment and educate yourselves, finally.

While I do not intend to *judge*, I will NOT sit idly by and go quietly about my business without standing up for the innocents and those that cannot defend themselves. I have become very active and will continue as long as I live. And, there are many more like me....and many to replace me when I am gone. We are instructed to protect those that are weak and to stand up to those that take advantage.

I would have never imagined that each of you were capable of this! It was convenient and solved your impatience issue and your need for personal freedom from responsibility and put a quick end to your wait...while sparing $ for you to add to your own accounts. I don't know or comprehend how you survive with the knowledge of what you have done.

I try to imagine that you were stressed, overtired, and succomed to the polished sales pitch of the hospice personnel. But, the fact that you watched it continue for 2 weeks and did NOT change your mind...continued to withold fluids... and became impatient when her death did not happen quickly enough .... well, only God can address that with you. I cannot. I cannot fathom or believe what you have done! Who gave *YOU* the right? How can you live with yourselves? My own heart has been ripped and torn by this. I realize that I didn't know any of you or realize what you were truly capable of doing! I would never have believed any of you were capable of this. How very, very weak you must be! Or, how completely selfish and self-serving! Or, possibly both! I do not know, nor will I ever understand.

I pray for God to help me with this. I pray for God to help each of you, too.

Shelly

NIV

I Timothy 1:9

We also know that law is made not for the righteous but for lawbreakers and rebels, the ungodly and sinful, the unholy and irreligious; for those who kill their fathers or mothers, for murderers,

KJV

Exodus 20:13

Thou shalt not kill.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Cheryl said...

At the same time, euthanasia advocates masked their true intentions by appealing to the sanctity of the family. If a patient had left no word about whether she wanted her life preserved, they argued, the decision should be made exclusively by her nearest and dearest -- her family. They inveighed against any governmental "interference" through the courts or even those agencies established to protect the rights of vulnerable people.

Now, having "succeeded" in achieving widespread legalization and acceptance of both of these positions, euthanasia proponents are dramatically changing their rhetoric.

As the pro-life movement has warned all along, the true motive of many leaders of the euthanasia movement is to eliminate those with a poor "quality of life." Individual rights, autonomy, and deference to farnilies were all convenient slogans with which they successfully assaulted what twenty-five years ago was the prevailing ethic of respect for all life.

Today, however, the culture has changed, so that the quality of life ethic arguably has become predominant. And in this context, euthanasia advocates are now discarding the principles of individual and family autonomy they once so extolled. For them, there is no room for respect for the autonomy of those who want to live.

Sounds FAMILIAR doesn't it? NO RESPECT For those that WANT to live....It is Granny's birthday. I have a picture of our grandmother on her 95th birthday, holding a cake made for her, smiling! Granny loved life, she loved her family and she gave her all to those closest to her.

In return she was lied to, deceived, and JUDGED ready to die (for their convenience), by those she trusted most. Shelly and I will never be quiet about this, we will never surrender to this deplorable act, nor will we EVER, EVER accept this type of action for other innocents whose voice others want to silence. It is such a PITY that those that you have loved, trusted and confided in COULD and DID make this kind of choice! WE will NEVER UNDERSTAND THIS. WE most certainly WILL NEVER ACCEPT THIS, and MOST OF ALL WE ARE ON THE MOVE. If we learn nothing else, we have learned that this deplorable action will not go away. It will not be SWEPT under the rug and ACCOUNTABILITY will be DEMANDED!

10:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My prayers go out to you, your sister and your beloved grandmother. I feel your pain ... I can see that you loved her very much. God be with you.

4:37 PM  
Blogger Jenni said...

I am so sorry Shelly. You may have already wrote about it, but was your grandmother declared brain dead before she passed on? I am seeking to understand why something like this could have happened?

My step-grandpa died about 10 years ago. He had lung cancer. One thing that happened always makes me sick to think about. He was on pain killers but still in a lot of pain. During the last week of his life, he began to go down-hill rapidly. At one lucid moment, I remember him saying, "It's those pills, ever since they gave me those new pain pills." He died less than a week later. I know that the doctors had just changed his prescription. The dose was probably so high that it killed him, and they knew it would. What bothers me so much about it was that they did it without his knowledge. Who knows? Maybe he would have chosen pain over immediate death...but he was never asked.

My prayers go out to you.

(And don't let the contrary comments get to you. You are allowed to voice your own thoughts and feelings...after all, it is your blog.)

1:21 PM  

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